I found this to be quite humorous...
Advice to Players
From the Bulletin of the USGA Green Section - May 21, 1923
The author of "The Golfer's Rain Jacket" is evidently a golfer (ed. note: this is apparently a reference to another article or publication of the time). There is much feeling embodied in his set of "Don'ts'." We pass along his advice.
"Don't move, talk, whistle, cough, sneeze, groan, grunt or even think out loud while a stroke is being played. Don't stand close to, in front of, behind or cast shadows across the player's line-while he is addressing a 'putt.' If the ball 'rims' the cup it then becomes your duty to restrain the player from any acts of violence."
"Don't play from a tee until the party in front have all played their second strokes, replaced their divots, relighted their pipes, concluded their golf stories, collected their caddies, selected their next clubs and are well out of range."
"Don't play up to a putting green until the party in front have all holed out, practiced their missed putts, replaced the flag, fixed up the score cards, exchanged the putters for drivers and all players and caddies are off the green."
"Don't be vexed if the players in front can't find their lost ball. Should they, eventually, signal you to 'play through' (and then play along with you), show your appreciation by giving each of them a cigar. The 'Flor de Killdead' is made for this purpose, and is sold by all fireworks stores."
"Don't fail to fill up and to smooth over neatly all footprints in the bunker sand. If you carry in your bag a small garden rake, a bricklayer's trowel and a wire broom, the operation will require only about half an hour."
"Don't neglect immediately and properly to replace the turf. A small sprinkling can, a canteen of water, an ordinary rolling pin, a package of grass seeds and one pound of 'dehydrated ostrich manure, added to your equipment, will reduce this obligation to a mere pleasure!"
"Don't play from a tee until the party in front have all played their second strokes, replaced their divots, relighted their pipes, concluded their golf stories, collected their caddies, selected their next clubs and are well out of range."
"Don't play up to a putting green until the party in front have all holed out, practiced their missed putts, replaced the flag, fixed up the score cards, exchanged the putters for drivers and all players and caddies are off the green."
"Don't be vexed if the players in front can't find their lost ball. Should they, eventually, signal you to 'play through' (and then play along with you), show your appreciation by giving each of them a cigar. The 'Flor de Killdead' is made for this purpose, and is sold by all fireworks stores."
"Don't fail to fill up and to smooth over neatly all footprints in the bunker sand. If you carry in your bag a small garden rake, a bricklayer's trowel and a wire broom, the operation will require only about half an hour."
"Don't neglect immediately and properly to replace the turf. A small sprinkling can, a canteen of water, an ordinary rolling pin, a package of grass seeds and one pound of 'dehydrated ostrich manure, added to your equipment, will reduce this obligation to a mere pleasure!"
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